Thursday, May. 02, 2002 - 6:02 p.m.
> >>WHY MOMS ARE GREAT
> > >
> > >MOM TAUGHT ME TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE
> > >"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside, I just finished
> > >cleaning!"
> > >
> > >MOM TAUGHT ME RELIGION
> > >"You better pray that will come out of that carpet!"
> > >
> > >MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT TIME TRAVEL
> > >"If you don't straighten up, I'll knock you into next week!"
> > >
> > >MOM TAUGHT ME LOGIC
> > >"Because I said so, that's why!"
> > >
> > >MOM TAUGHT ME FORESIGHT
> > >"Make sure you wear clean underwear in case you're in an accident."
> > >
> > >MOM TAUGHT ME IRONY
> > >"Keep laughing and I'll give you something to cry about!"
> > >
> > >MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT THE SCIENCE OF OSMOSIS
> > >"Shut your mouth and eat your supper!"
> > >
> > >MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT CONTORTIONISTS
> > >"Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck?"
> > >
> > >MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT STAMINA
> > >"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone!"
> > >
> > >MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT WEATHER
> > >"It looks like a tornado went through your room!"
> > >
> > >MOM TAUGHT ME HOW TO SOLVE PHYSICS PROBLEMS
> > >"If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you, would you listen
> > >then?"
> > >
> > >MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT HYPOCRISY
> > >"If I told you once, I've told you a million times-don't exaggerate!"
> > >
> > >MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION
> > >"Stop acting like your father!"
> > >
> > >MOM TAUGHT ME ABOUT ENVY
> > >"There are millions of less fortunate kids in this world who don't have
> > >wonderful parents like you do!"
> > >
> > >And most of all.....
> > >
> > >MOM TAUGHT ME THE CIRCLE OF LIFE
> > >"I brought you into this world, I can take you out!"
> > >
> > >So there.
